My nights

We are gonna girl-talk about sweating. At night. While sleeping. AKA nightsweats.

If you have a penis, you may want to close this sucker up right now. 'Cause it ain't pretty or sexy.

Am I the only 38 year old in the world who wakes up from terribly vivid dreams, shivering? Why would I be shivering, you ask? Because the gallons of sweat that my body has produced has cooled my body temperature to an uncomfortable, wet 85 degrees.

If you are a 'middle aged' woman (however, I am NOT middle aged, thank you very much) and have not experienced this wonderful hormonal transition yet, you are in for a grand treat.

Essentially, for about two weeks before 'that time of the month' (however, lately it has been for a solid month, every night), I wake up about 4:00AM, after having very odd dreams. If I have been able to sleep fully clothed that night (which is not my preference), I wake up with my clothes drenched. Soaking. If I was not able to sleep with pajama pants or sweats, I wake up in a pool of sweat, such as last night. 

If this hasn't happened to you, you cannot comprehend the amount of fluid that is possible of escaping your body. Just wait.

Here are some stats for you to ponder. Our last child was born in 2005. Have been off birth control since 2004. Night sweats started sometime in 2008, when I was 35 or 36ish. Pre-menopausal symptoms can go on for 10 years for some people. My periods also can last anywhere from 7 to 14 days.

My sweats always coincide with  dream. And, the dream typically involves one of these events: 1) Being emotionally or physically abandoned by my husband (he pays dearly for this the following day), 2) Not being able to physically get where it is I am going either because I am lost, confused, or do not have the resources, such as say, a code to get me through a door, or 3) Trying to move via walking or running, but I stay in the same place. (For your information, I am aware of my abandonment issues, that I conclude to be a direct result of two relationships - one from high school and one that ended in college before I met my sweet husband.)

But what comes first? The dreams or the nightsweats? The age-old question of the chicken or the egg.

I have asked three doctors about my nightsweats, which do not seem right at my age. Two of them have been female, each of them right about my age, and they both have looked at me like it is the oddest thing they have heard of. The male ob/gyn just shrugged his shoulders, of course... kind of when I told him I was concerned we weren't getting pregnant (with #2) after years of trying, and he just said, "So do it like rabbits and stop worrying." 

The last doctor put me back on birth control hoping the hormones would help. One month down, and no help at all with the sweats. We shall give it two more months before I give up.

Am I the only one? Does anyone have any suggestions for me (that do not involve herbs, because they don't work either)? Or is it a lost cause and I wait it out?